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5 秒造一句「土味情话」,听说追女神用这招准没错?

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树洽树洽

<p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064370" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/22222.jpg" alt="" width="1200" height="675" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/22222.jpg 1200w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/22222-360x203.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/22222-768x432.jpg 768w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/22222-1024x576.jpg 1024w" sizes="(max-width: 1200px) 100vw, 1200px" /></p> <blockquote><p>你是三,我是九。</p> <p>我除了你,还是你。</p></blockquote> <p>比起需要模拟「脑血栓患者」的社会摇,以及一包水泥、一首《金色年华》BGM 就能衬托起葬爱家族贵族气息的斗舞…</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064436" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9ad634b95731569d6f1cab3b01a377d9ea3156ed.jpg" alt="" width="1152" height="720" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9ad634b95731569d6f1cab3b01a377d9ea3156ed.jpg 1152w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9ad634b95731569d6f1cab3b01a377d9ea3156ed-360x225.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9ad634b95731569d6f1cab3b01a377d9ea3156ed-768x480.jpg 768w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9ad634b95731569d6f1cab3b01a377d9ea3156ed-1024x640.jpg 1024w" sizes="(max-width: 1152px) 100vw, 1152px" /></p> <div class="editor-image-source"> <p>▲ 三炮团队的表锅.图片来自:<a class="o5rIVb irc_hol i3724 irc_lth" tabindex="0" href="https://www.bilibili.com/video/av19785107/" target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-noload="" data-ved="2ahUKEwiO9ojZoJfcAhXGTLwKHco7BpQQjB16BAgBEAQ"><span class="irc_ho" dir="ltr">哔哩哔哩</span></a></p> </div> <p>土味情话可能是土味文化三驾马车里,模仿门槛最低的一个。</p> <p>简单的几句话,就能顺着对方的回应引出一句肉麻油腻又乡土感十足的情话,从而实现一种引人发笑,又在诙谐幽默的语境下无形撩人的效果。</p> <p>今天,知晓君就告诉你怎么快速学会一两句土味情话。</p> <blockquote><p>现在把你的心放在我这里,每天倾听我的爱意…</p></blockquote> <p>啊!呸…不好意思,入戏太深了。</p> <p>其实很简单,有了「土味情话合集」这款小程序,你就不必再点开一首《苏喂苏喂》的歌曲去营造一个土味氛围,也不必去 A/B 站观看一堆土味视频、苦苦揣摩土味情话当中的造句技巧。</p> <h3>给男女神发土味情话,最快只要 5 秒钟</h3> <p>打开「土味情话合集」小程序的首页,它的功能比较简单,包含了「今天要说什么情话」、「学习学习土味情话」两个栏目,一个为你提供随机的土味情话,另一个则是堪称「土味情话每日放送机」,每天定时更新源源不断地新式土味情话。</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064410" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/iij.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="884" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/iij.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/iij-360x318.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/iij-768x679.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <p>先说说「学习学习土味情话」这个栏目,它每天提供了大量土味情话给你,并将情话的开头作为标题,如果你对这个标题感兴趣,点进去,就有完整的情话供你参考。</p> <p>例如:</p> <blockquote><p>你近视吗</p> <p>那你怎么看不出我喜欢你。</p></blockquote> <p>将喜欢的土味情话单点复制、粘贴、发送,待对方回复,再复制第二句、粘贴、发送即可。</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064390" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/8ii.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="885" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/8ii.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/8ii-360x319.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/8ii-768x680.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <p>如果你不想浪费时间查找土味情话,你也可以使用随机土味情话,点开「今天要说什么情话」,小程序便会随机为你生成一段情话。</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064389" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/11-8.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="1244" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/11-8.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/11-8-360x448.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/11-8-768x955.jpg 768w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/11-8-823x1024.jpg 823w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <blockquote><p>你猜我爱喝酒还是爱打游戏?</p> <p>不!我爱你~</p></blockquote> <h3>令人措手不及的土味情话,防不胜防!</h3> <p>当然,你可能会觉得这些土味情话说出来有点尬,令人背脊发凉。但其实,你可以让它变得更有趣一些,让它在聊天时无孔不入,以达到出其不意的效果。</p> <p>于是,知晓君做了一次试验,用土味情话与女同事们聊天。</p> <p><strong>女同事 A ——三次,就对土味情话产生免疫</strong></p> <p>女同事 A 为人纯真,第一次用土味情话跟她聊天的时候,她并没有意识到知晓君说的一句话已经是一个「圈套」。</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064347" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/12-5.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="439" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/12-5.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/12-5-360x158.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/12-5-768x337.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <p>第二次用土味情话搭讪的时候,她已经能够反应过来。</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064349" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/99j-1.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="503" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/99j-1.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/99j-1-360x181.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/99j-1-768x386.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /><br /> 第三次再使用土味情话的时候,她已经对土味情话产生了抗体……</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064354" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/jfmm.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="515" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/jfmm.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/jfmm-360x185.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/jfmm-768x396.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <p>并且后来已经能猜中套路了……</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064356" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/kk.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="467" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/kk.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/kk-360x168.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/kk-768x359.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <p><strong>女同事 B ——一次便成反调戏高手</strong></p> <p>女同事 B 生性活泼,思维敏锐,第一次用土味情话跟她聊天的时候,她浑然不知。</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064364" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/lll.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="416" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/lll.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/lll-360x150.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/lll-768x319.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <p>当知道这是一个「套路」之后,她已经学会自己造句,反调戏。</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064362" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9j-1.jpg" alt="" width="1000" height="361" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9j-1.jpg 1000w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9j-1-360x130.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/9j-1-768x277.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px" /></p> <p>由此看出,土味情话的例句虽然比较繁多,但一旦用泛滥了,或者碰上了流行的例句,也会一下子让人猜中套路,变得无趣。为了让土味情话变得出其不意,令人防不胜防,你还是得在句式的基础上进行再造句。</p> <p>不过,在这之前,你还是得通过这个小程序多看一些例句,才能以不变应万变,成为万中无一的「土味情话王」!</p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1064431" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/2222.jpg" alt="" width="800" height="410" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/2222.jpg 800w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/2222-360x185.jpg 360w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/2222-768x394.jpg 768w" sizes="(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px" /></p> <p style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #808080; font-size: 14px;">「土味情话合集」小程序使用链接</span><br /> <a href="https://minapp.com/miniapp/7723/"><span style="color: #808080; font-size: 14px;">https://minapp.com/miniapp/7723/</span></a></p> <p><strong>关注「<span style="color: #605eac;">知晓程序</span>」公众号 ,在微信后台回复「<span style="color: #605eac;">藏宝图</span>」,获取最好玩的小程序全名单。</strong></p> <p><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1049625" src="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/2-7.gif" alt="" width="750" height="375" srcset="https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/2-7.gif 750w, https://images.ifanr.cn/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/2-7-360x180.gif 360w" sizes="(max-width: 750px) 100vw, 750px" /></p>